Thursday, March 25 - The End Times

We met at Shelley's house this time and she made a delicious lasagna! Yummy! But first, the food for our spirits!

Alice wanted to focus on the 2nd coming and the time line around that taking place.  There are a lot of things we understand, vaguely understand, and don't understand at all.  She wanted us to pick some things about the end times and 2nd coming and we would collectively dive in!

She first showed us a quick clip called Are You Ready? Click here to see!  It was a short illustration of how the Rapture might occur... kinda cool actually.  I used to worry about whether I would be burned to a crisp when Jesus returned, mostly because of the legalistic way I was raised.  I had a lot of toxic shame (not healthy guilt) about all of my sins and didn't think I would ever be good enough to "make it".  Alice pointed out that we had all accepted Jesus as our Savior.  In that regard, we'll be in good hands when the worst of the end is taking place.

1 Thessalonians 4:16-17 (New International Version)

¹⁶For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. ¹⁷After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.

In 1 Peter 4:7 it talks about being watchful and aware that the end is near, though, thus being a good call to understand what will happen during these times.

Anyway, Alice pointed out that Matthew 24:36 says that no one will know the day or the hour when Jesus will come again.  She thought it interesting that it didn't mention a year - she did a little math.  Ezekiel talks about the Jews being restored to Israel as part of the last day prophecies.  In 1948, Israel was restored.  Matthew 24:34 indicates that in the same generation that Israel is restored, Jesus would return.  So, just for fun, Alice determined what an approximate "generation" would be.  She determined, based on the genealogy of Christ given in Matthew, that a generation is about 70 years.  She looked at the time that had passed from Abraham to Jesus - 2018 years.  From Jesus to Israel becoming a nation - 2018 years.  The year that took place was 1948 and adding a "generation" to it of 70 years - the year 2018.  Just a fun thought.  Not doctrinal, but definitely interesting.


In any case, we know based on all of the "events" that are to take place in the "last days", the end is certainly near.  The eschatology - the study of end times - is a subject large enough to study for days, weeks, months, even years!!!  We pretty much barely touched the vast variety of topics that can be discussed regarding the end time events... more to come!!!


In the meantime, I had an "aha" moment - or what Alice called a "Golden Nugget".
I had been continuing to contemplate the concept of the Trinity - I really was doing well with accepting that belief, but then I listened to an interview with Shawn McCraney and it became even more clear to me.
He referred to our bodies as three in one because we have a body, a soul (our mind, emotions, and will) and our spirit which enters fully when we are re-born in Christ.  Three different elements, one being.  Makes sense... well, it makes sense about God too!!!  Love it!!!

Thursday, March 18 - Our Worth in Christ

So, I had offered to have this Thursday meeting at my house to give Alice a break!  I was pretty excited, but nervous, because it had been a long time since I gave any kind of "lesson" to others.  Since I feel pretty childlike in the knowledge of the Bible outside of Mormonism, I was worried that I might get it wrong.

I had been struggling with issues of self worth.  I am not happy with my current weight, my hair is thinning out to the point of looking bald to me, and I'm so tired most of the time that my motivation is nil. I had also heard a lot of people close to me be very hard on themselves about their image or their abilities.  So, I knew exactly what I had to do for our study.

Alice, Shelley, and her daughter, Kati, were in attendance. I started out the lesson with a song that I had written when I was 15 called "I Am Who I Am".  It talks about not fitting in with what the "world" sees as beautiful, but trying to be ok with who I am anyway.  I explained to them that I had started going to youth dances and was incredibly discouraged because I never got asked to dance.  I did not fit the mold of what was acceptable, even at a church function.  After singing the song, I had everyone write down everything that bothers them about themselves, including both outward and inward characteristics.

While they were doing that, I showed them a clip about the transformation of a regular looking person who was prepped for a commercial billboard, and when all was said and done, with make-up, lighting, computer generated changes, that person was completely different looking.  The world's view of what is beautiful is often based on what is not even real!

I gave everyone a Styrofoam cup that had their name on it.  I also gave them a sharp pointed stick.  I told them that for everything they had written down on their paper, they were to pierce the cup.  They even said out loud some of the things they had written down while they were piercing the cup.  I asked them what would happen if you tried to fill the cup with liquid and they all knew that now that there were holes in the cup, it could not hold anything.  I then passed out another cup, which I had colored yellow on the outside, and on the inside was a picture of Jesus.  I told them that Jesus asked to have the "cup" of wrath, suffering and death removed from him, but submitted to the will of the Father on our behalf for our benefit.  When we chose to believe that Jesus saved us from everything that brings us down, we took His name upon us.  I had them put that cup inside of the one they had just punctured.  I then shared with them that John 4:14 says that whoever drinks of the water Jesus offers, they will never be thirsty again, and Jesus will be a fountain of water eternally.  With Him, our cup can hold water.  With Him, all of those puncture wounds go away.  In Him, we are beautiful.

1 Peter 3:3- 4  Let your beauty not be external – the braiding of hair and wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes – but the inner person of the heart, the lasting beauty
of a gentle and tranquil spirit, which is precious in God’s sight.
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised.
2 Corinthians 4:16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
1 Samuel 16:7 The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.

We don't have to worry about the "world's" standard of beauty - we are beautiful in Christ.

I shared that when I was around 10 or 11, I had been taught in swimming lessons that when you go out swimming in nature's waters, you should have a buddy and a buddy stick.  Should you get into a risky situation with the water, your buddy should use the stick to pull you back out and into safety.  My friend and I were swimming in a creek and I fell into swift waters.  She pulled me back out and into safety because we had a buddy stick.  I was so relieved and glad to have made it through what was a very scary situation!

Christ offers us a buddy stick when we are in turbulent waters that threaten to drown us.  However, something I recently learned, is that WE have to grab the stick - we have to make the choice to be rescued by Him.

When we do make that choice, we can realize more clearly God's love for us. I recited John 3:16 with my name inserted in it: God so loved Ari-Amber that He gave His only begotten Son that if I believe in Him, I will not perish, but have everlasting life!  Ephesians 2: 8-9 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.  A gift! What an awesome gift!

I told the story found in Luke 15 about the prodigal son.  I reminded these beautiful ladies that there is NOTHING that we can do that will stop God from loving us and opening His arms to us ALWAYS.  The gift did not stipulate anything other than faith - it didn't say we had to not sin - good thing, cuz we all do!

I played them a song I had found called "If You Could See What I See" sung by Maribeth Johnson.  The lyrics are as follows:

If I could see what You see
When You look at me
I would begin to understand
Who I really am
I would know how deep
Your love is for me
If I could see what You see
If I could see what You see
When You look at me
I would begin to realize
Why You had to die
I would know what You gave
To take my sins away
If I could see what You see
I would see a wonderful
And beautiful creation
In Your eyes I’m nothing less
Than an image of You
If I could see what You see
When You look at me
I would begin to know Your heart
And who You really are
I would fall to my knees
And thank You endlessly
If I could see what You see
If I could see what You see

This song can also be heard here: If You Could See What I See

I then explained to them that we needed to replace the negative things that we think or say to ourselves with positive.  I gave them note cards and a note holder and asked them to make positive affirmations out of the things they had previously written down as negative.

We then had yummy chicken tostadas and Spanish rice! Yum!

I love Thursdays!

Thursday, March 11 - Startling Proofs and More!

First of all, I just have to say, "Alice, you are so amazing!"  Alice spends time during the week looking up answers to my questions, praying on my behalf, rejoicing in my triumphs in Christ, and then gives up her Thursday evening to help me get closer to God AND feeds me dinner too! When it comes to time, Alice makes an offering of a lot more than 10% to help me! I'm so thankful to have such a wonderful friend!

So, Alice had wanted us to watch a movie she had picked up called "Startling Proofs" because it was a great movie about the scientific evidence of God's existence.  I was looking forward to it!  Shelley was running late, so while we postponed watching the movie until she arrived, Alice and I discussed the questions I had sent to her prior to her switching the Thursday study to the movie.

My first inquiry was about life after life and the validity of ghosts or spirits.  Having been taught in Mormonism that our spirits went to "prison or paradise" and that the location of this place was another dimension of this earth, I once thought it possible that people's spirits could come and visit once they had passed.

She indicated that in 2 Corinthians 5 is refers to our desire to return to our heavenly home with the Lord.  She also gave me a book to take home and read about heaven.  That book also indicated we go to live with the Lord.  It also said that spirits do not come back to earth once they are dead.  Alice agreed with this conclusion when I had asked her about people seeing deceased relatives.  She believes that there are Angels and Demons - they are a different "species" from humans.  Angels can and do watch over and protect us.  However, demons can take on many forms to deceive us.  They would like to distract us from focusing our faith and love on the Lord.  Consequently, I looked up scriptures that were about "ghosts" and all of them that included references to people coming back from the dead were used in correlation with witchcraft and sorcery.

Next was paid ministry and tithing.  I had brought this up because I had grown up in a church where there was "no paid ministry" in the ward level of service.  Tithing was not a foreign concept to me, as I had faithfully given my 10% throughout my activity being LDS. However, now that I was out of it, paying tithing and knowing it went to the pastor's paycheck was difficult when the pastor speaks openly about how generous he is with his staff and how many extravagant vacations he goes on.  When my family struggles from paycheck to paycheck, I feel like the church I give my tithe to should be a little more accountable about utilizing that money for the good of the whole church.
Alice and I had had a phone conversation prior to our Thursday study about tithe.  She said that giving tithe may not necessarily mean money.  She also said, from her own opinion, that tithe doesn't have to be to the church because "inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, my brethren, ye have done it unto me" (Matthew 25:40).  That made a lot of sense to me!
Additionally, in doing further research later about tithing on the net.bible.org site, it said the following:

Meaning of Tithe

Topic: Tithe

Word meaning “tenth,” used of the offering of a tenth for religious purposes. Abraham gave a tenth to Melchizedek, the priest-king (Gen. 14:18-20). The Israelites were required to give a tithe to the Levites (Num. 18:21, 24), and the Levites in turn were to give a tithe of the tithe to the priests (Num. 18:25-28). The tithe was taken from things like grain, fruits, and animals (Lev. 27:30-32). There is no command to tithe in the New Testament (cf. 1 Cor. 16:2), but many Christians believe that the concept is a useful guide in their giving.

The Shaw Pocket Bible Handbook, Walter A. Elwell, Editor, (Harold Shaw Publ., Wheaton , IL; 1984), p. 360

I found it interesting that all of the references to tithe were in the Old Testament - the old law.  I looked up 1 Corinthians 16:2 - "On the first day of every week, each one of you should set aside a sum of money in keeping with his income, saving it up, so that when I come no collections will have to be made." When I looked at the translation for "collections" it referred to the gathering of funds for the poor.
In regard to paid ministry, Alice referenced the scripture 1 Corinthians 9:14.  It says that those who preach the gospel should receive their living by the gospel.  Some translations show that it means financially, while others just say good things should be given to them.  2 Corinthians 9:7 says that if we decide to, we should give cheerfully and not because we are compelled to.  This leads me to believe that free will offerings or donations are what is acceptable to clergy-men.
In my current situation, I concluded from this research that the tithe from my family needed to go toward helping the poor - both physically and spiritually.  I think that is what God would want me to do to show him I am grateful for the things he has given me.

The final question I had sent to Alice was about how one can "know" the truth about something.  I had been taught that I would have a "burning in my bosom" or a warm, fuzzy feeling when something was truth.  However, Alice showed me that the truth was found in God's word which is the bible.  Jeremiah 17:9 says that the human heart is deceitful.  Just because we have feelings about something doesn't make it a fact.  Proverbs 9:10 says that respect of the Lord is wisdom.  I had asked this question of her before I had my experience on Tuesday with being saved.  I learned from that experience also, that it isn't a warm, fuzzy that makes one saved.  It is a choice!

The movie - it was very good.  In it, the first point discussed was whether this world was created by chance, or by design. From a scientific standpoint, there is evidence that can not be refuted in nature that it is impossible this world could have been created by chance.
For example, the Big Bang Theory - destruction and chaos are the results of an explosion, not systematic order. Everything in our Universe, our Galaxy, our Earth and even our DNA - all are systematic. These things are so complex that them happening by chance is just not possible. It's like if a contractor got wood, nails, tools and all the necessary building materials to build a house, then lit off a few sticks of dynamite and then BOOM, there's an office building soundly built. The likelihood of that happening is impossible.
Another point used the illustration of a watch - inside of a watch are all kinds of parts, gadgets, etc, that make the watch work. However, the watch didn't just gather together by chance, a watch make put all those parts together... Our universe could not have happened by chance and been as organized as it is - there had to be a creator.
The next point that was made was that the Bible, which is the Christian's belief of being the word of God, has been proven to be accurate. The writings have been verified as authentic, the copies of the dead sea scrolls show a verbatim part of the Bible as we now have it, the events in the Old Testament that were prophesied hundreds of years prior came to pass in the New Testament. The places in the Bible have been verified as valid.
The final point was that if there was an all knowing God, he would be able to know the future. Based on the book of Revelations alone, there is evidence that God put in the mind of John what the "last days" would look like. Almost every single event prophesied in Revelations has come to pass.
If you want to download the e-book for free, you can go to this site:
http://shop.cloudtenpictures.com/fre...ofs-ebook.html
It can explain all these points so much better and more thoroughly than I can.
In any case, after having seen it, there is really no doubt in my mind that there is a Creator, that Creator is God and it is the same God that is written about in the Bible.

What's on the menu for next time we meet? Well, I volunteered to have the study at my house, to make dinner and I am going to have a really, really cool lesson!!!!!!!!!!!  Can't wait to share all about it!

I AM SAVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh boy.... Big day!

I had completed my last blog entry and thought, "I am asking, seeking and knocking" like Matthew 7:7 says to do.  The prayer in my heart was to be completely convinced to be saved and accept Jesus as my Savior.

Baby Ryan woke up from his nap and I mixed up some baby cereal for him.  He was so excited to eat, he was banging on his high chair and grinning from ear to ear.  His smile just brought this overwhelming euphoric feeling to my heart... I was so happy to see him be so happy!  The lyrics to a song by Jann Arden (who isn't even a Christian artist) came to mind: "I am breathless in the mercy of a smile!"  Then I thought of the chorus to that same song:

I am saved, I believe, I am not going to be like I was, I have changed, I am saved!

Then, like continued inspiration, I thought about how much I love my son and how much I want to protect him, keep him healthy and safe, and be vigilant of his well being.  It resonated with what I just researched about what the word "saved" meant in it's translation. (From my previous post: The word "saved" is translated from the word sozo.  It means the following: To deliver or protect [literally or figuratively], to heal, preserve, do well, and be [make] whole.) God just wants to protect me, keep me healthy and safe, and be vigilant of MY well being!  The love I have for my son is just a portion of the love God has for me!

I was contemplating that when I decided to call Alice.  She was telling me that this coming Thursday she wanted to have us watch a movie she had gotten about God, the Bible and how things that were prophesied about  are now happening. 
She said, "You will be totally convinced that there is a God after seeing this movie!" 
I said, "I am convinced that there is a God - I've never doubted that.  I've doubted that Christ is the only way to God.  When I stepped away from the religion I was raised in, I tried to learn about all religions and what they taught.  I came to the conclusion that if 'God is Love' and those religions all taught that and were good, then there is more than one way." 
She said to me, "Do you believe the religion you were raised in is truth?" 
I said, "No, I don't.  I found that it was based on erroneous teaching." 
She said, "But it still has 'good' teachings." 
I said, "Good point."

She went on to make an illustration to me. 
She said, "If I were drowning and you were on a boat, what would you do?" 
I said, "I would throw a life preserver out to you." 
She said, "But what good would that do if I chose not to grab it.  What if I just continued to flail and kick and not grab it?" 
I responded, "You would drown."
She said, "When you 'knock,' you are the one who opens the door." 

AND THEN IT CLICKED!!!!!!!!  Being "saved" was a CHOICE.

This certainly wasn't what I was expecting - I was expecting more work, or a huge momentous event, or something else.  It's a choice.  I had to choose to accept the life preserver so that I could be pulled out of the troubled waters and find rest aboard the good ship Jesus.  This analogy of drowning was particularly profound, as up to this point, I felt I had been in-over-my-head in life.  I needed something to pull me out of the overwhelming struggles I had been facing and nothing had ever worked.

This illustration also greatly clarified to me the separation between Christianity and all other beliefs... There is a Savior.  That Savior was and is Jesus Christ. Without Him, mankind could never, no matter how well-meaning and despite our best efforts, be without carnal thoughts, actions and behaviors - forever separating us from God. Though He could have eternally reigned on a Heavenly throne and watched us drown from above, He choose to subject Himself to humanity to save us from ourselves.  The Ultimate Life Preserver!

Shortly after getting off the phone with Alice, Baby Ryan was fussing and crying.  I tried to give him his favorite teething toy, I tried putting him in his swing chair, I tried nursing him.  Nothing would calm him but holding him to my heart and rocking him.  Only after I did that did he calm down and fall asleep.  Again, God used motherhood to teach me... nothing else in this world will calm me but choosing to accept the love Jesus has for me - only in Him will I be calm and find rest.

Then to seal the deal, a song came on Pandora (internet radio) on the Contemporary Christian station I was listening to.  It was by Chris Tomlin and was his version of Amazing Grace with his own chorus of My Chains Are Gone.  Here is the chorus:

My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy rains
Unending love, Amazing grace

(actually hearing it is so powerful, I recommend it!)

And so, I proclaim, "I AM SAVED!"
"How precious did that grace appear, The hour I first believed."

The Best Part! Thursday March 4 Continued

The best part about our study was that after Alice had explained, so beautifully, all of the information she had to answer the questions I had given her (see study answers in previous post), she had prepared for us the Lord's supper and blessed oil.  She first blessed the cracker that represented the body of Christ and we took it. Then she blessed the grape juice that represented the blood of Christ and we took it.  (I wished that baby Ryan had not been so fussy during this - I felt it may have distracted us from the Spirit a little.  But what can ya do?)  After that, she had pure oil that she dabbed on both Shelley and my forehead.  She then blessed both of us in a prayer.
She said that she would continue to pray for us as we were making efforts to discover what our relationship with Christ is - when we would have the "click" moment of truly feeling it all come together and be saved!

Alice had shared - Isaiah 10:27 - It shall come to pass in that day that his burden will be taken away from your shoulder, And his yoke from your neck, And the yoke will be destroyed because of the anointing oil.  The yoke and burden of keeping all the rules was taken away with Christ's sacrifice.  Matthew 11:29-30 says Take MY yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear and my load is not heavy.
Well, my soul needs to be put to rest with complete faith - I think that would happen if I could just accept his yoke instead of mine or anyone else's imposed upon me.  My load is heavy, the load others have placed upon me is heavy, but Jesus' is not.

I did a little research of my own.  I went to one of my new favorite sites netbible.org. (Thanks Alice - that site has been SOOOO helpful!)  I put in the search the word "saved".  It pulled up all the scriptures that have that word in it.  The one that seemed most fitting for my situation was Mark 16:16 - The one who believes and is baptized will be saved, but the one who does not believe will be condemned.
Believe and be baptized.  The word "saved" is translated from the word sozo.  It means the following:
To deliver or protect (literally or figuratively), to heal, preserve, do well, and be (make) whole.
Hmmmm.... just believe and be baptized, huh? I could use all those "sozo" things.


In the meantime, at home, I've been listening to contemporary Christian music, praying for guidance, and trying to set the tone for myself to invite that to happen.

Thursday, March 4th - Son of Man & Communion and Blessed Oil

I started writing this on Thursday the 4th and then a didn't finish! Here it is Monday already... doh!

I guess I didn't realize that the topics we picked out for went to well with each other.  I had asked Alice about why Jesus calls himself the "Son of Man" so much.  She also mentioned she was going to tell us about communion and blessed oil.  We were also going to talk about how and when one gets "saved".  Those were what were on the table for this Thursday study.  Alice, bless her heart, had prepared such awesome information for all of it!

So, first, the Son of Man...
In Daniel 7:13-14, it tells about the vision and prophecy that took place regarding the coming of Christ.  He refers to the "Son of Man" because he could see that the Messiah would come as a man. The Jewish people were familiar with this term because of this reference and so when Jesus refers to himself in that way, it's him saying he is the Messiah.
In John 1:1, it says "the word" was God.  An explanation from netbible.org says the following about the word "logos" which is the translation for "the word":

In John, denotes the essential Word of God, Jesus Christ, the
personal wisdom and power in union with God, his minister in
creation and government of the universe, the cause of all the
world's life both physical and ethical, which for the procurement
of man's salvation put on human nature in the person of Jesus the
Messiah, the second person in the Godhead, and shone forth
conspicuously from His words and deeds.

In this way, Jesus was fully God.  But in verse 4 of the same chapter, it explains that he took on human life.  He was fully God, the Messiah, and also a human being. That is what makes his sacrifice so phenomenal - he left his heavenly home to become man and suffer for us!  He made Grace and Mercy become reality for our lives against the demands of justice.

Which brings us to our next topic - Communion and Blessed Oil - which was something I was previously familiar with, but not to this extent.
I was familiar with the meaning of communion.  The bread is representative of the body of Christ and the wine of his blood - a reminder of his sacrifice.  However, here was an interesting new tidbit of information - In 1 Corinthians 11, it talks about taking the bread and wine "unworthily".  I was brought up to understand that meant that if I was with sin, I should not partake.  However, Alice showed us a video clip by Joseph Prince called "Health and Wholeness through the Holy Communion".  In it, Joseph Prince addressed the confusion about the scripture in Corinthians about taking the communion.  He said that he too had been previously taught that you should not come to the Lord's table if there is sin in your life and by doing so, you could get sick.  He said it is no wonder that the world is sick because so many reject Christ, but why do Christians get sick? Why are they weak, sick and "falling asleep" or go to an early grave, as the scripture says?  Everyone is getting weaker day by day because that is the aging process.  The Lord's supper was given to offset this process! Because of erroneous, legalistic translation, some have made the Lord's supper as responsible for weakness and sickness, but actually it is the answer for it! The reason Christ shed his blood and was sacrificed was FOR the sinners! If we are not sinful, why do we need a Savior? The term "unworthily" is not an unworthy person... "unworthily" is an adverb, describing the action not the actor.  He is saying not to take it in an unworthy manner or irreverently, not fully appreciating his sacrifice for us!!! The greek translation for "examine yourself" in verse 31 means to not doubt.
I have never, ever heard anything like this! It was an "aha" moment! I could take the "sacrament", even knowing I was full of sin (as everyone is) if I would just take it in the spirit of faith that Christ did it for me and not doubt that - to "proclaim his death" as the scripture says!!! Holy Cow!  What a great discovery!  The point was also brought home when Alice showed us a video with the song by Third Day called Communion with graphics of Jesus' sacrifice. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5x6khRQFlOc
He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed. (Isaiah 53:5)
Also, in regard to when and where a communion can take place, Alice pointed out the 1 Corinthians 11:24 & 25 says "Do this" in his remembrance.  He doesn't say, it has to be done by a church leader, someone with "authority" or in a certain way other than in his remembrance.  I could bless and partake all by myself! That was a cool "aha" too!
Taking it one step further, Alice showed us that there were three important symbolic elements throughout the Bible - not just the bread and water - but also oil.  In Numbers 15:4-5, it refers to making sacrifices as an offering. In addition to a lamb, they were to offer a portion of grain mixed with a portion of olive oil and also a portion of new wine.   In Deuteronomy 7:13 it talks about God blessing the people with grain, new wine and oil.  Again in Deuteronomy 11:14 it refers to grain, new wine and olive oil as a blessing.
We were already pretty familiar with the bread and the water and what they represented.  However, the oil was a new concept for me to use in correlation with the other two.  Alice showed us in the New Testament why the oil was significant.
In John 18:1-2, it refers to Jesus going into the vineyard - the same one that he went to with his disciples frequently. Matthew 26:36 tells us that that place was called Gethsemane.  Translated, that means oil press. Matthew 26 continues to detail how in that place, Gethsemane, was the place where Jesus was "pressed" with his coming sacrifice. In verse 39 is tells of how he was face down to the ground praying to have the "cup" pass from him.  The cup, as researched at netbible.org, is "the wrath of God that Jesus would experience (in the form of suffering and death) for us" (http://net.bible.org/bible.php?book=Mat&chapter=26#v48).  In that "oil press" vineyard, he was pressed with the weight of what he was about to do.  Interestingly enough, oil, to be pure, needs to be pressed.
Going to Luke 7:37, we learn that a woman, who was a sinner, learned where Jesus was eating and brought oil.  She wet his feet with her tears, washed them with her hair, kissed them, and anointed them with the oil she brought. This shows that anyone can use oil to bless others - not just those with certain "authority" or clergy-ship. Even a sinner woman performed this humble act.
But back to the three symbolic elements.  The bread is Christ's body, the wine is his blood and the oil is the weight of his sacrifice - so we could be forgiven, healed and believe!
To believe - that is part of the equation of the question "Are You Saved?"  Accepting Jesus as our Savior and understanding why he died is part of the answer.  Alice said she knew these things, but one day she was listening to a Christian song on the radio in her car and it just all clicked - she just knew that she knew that she knew.  I expressed that I had recently seen on a Christian forum where an LDS young man was defending the religion with total conviction.  I used to be one of those LDS people - totally convinced that I had the total and only truth on the earth today! In high school, I remember completely defending the LDS faith when my "Christian" friends would debate it.  Now that I have discovered that it is actually based on false teachings - a wolf in sheep's clothing - I am pretty hesitant to "commit" to calling anything "truth" like I once did.  It was hugely devastating to find out what I had believed my entire life was not true - I never want to feel that loss again!  So, intellectually, I have studied and learned about Jesus and really, really want to completely believe that he is "the way", but if I'm being completely honest, I'm still filled with hesitation.  I want to be as convicted about Christianity as I once was about being LDS.  I know I will have to continue to study, pray and truly seek the answers thoroughly to get there.  I really hope I can!

Thursday, February 25 - The Power to Act in God's Name & Prayer

While I had gone to Alice's house for a couple of Thursday gatherings with people from Puyallup Foursquare, last Thursday was our first official "Bible Buddy Study".  Alice, Shelly and I gathered around Alice's table.  I had emailed Alice a few questions before hand and she had researched the answers. 
My questions were as follows:
1. Where do people get the power to act in God's name? We were taught in LDS study that it was by the laying on of hands by those who already had been "blessed" with the authority... ???
2. When you pray, do you kneel? Or do you just say prayers in your mind? Do you say them out loud?
3. In LDS study they teach that we were in existence before this life... is that true in the rest of Christianity also? Life before life?


Alice was so prepared with answers... from the Bible!!!

1. In Matthew 28:19, Jesus gave His power to everyone! He told his disciples to go out and baptize so that they could teach others and continue the cycle of discipleship.  In Acts 8:38, Phillip, who was not of the original 12 apostles Jesus chose, baptized someone.  In other words, the power of God was not just with the original 12.  It was perpetuated as they taught others, who taught others, etc.  Jesus' role while he was here was to teach us how to live so we could teach others.
2. In 1 Timothy 2:8 is speaks about lifting up holy hands in prayer. In John 17:1 is says to look toward heaven.  In Luke 22:41-44 it talks about kneeling to pray.  In Matthew 26:38-39 it tells about praying with your face to the ground. In 1 Chronicles 17:16, King David sat before the Lord.  Ultimately, prayer is a personal thing that when done with the "fear" or respect of God, can be done in many ways!
3. In Genesis 2:7, God breathed the breath of life into Adam.  In 1 Corinthians 15:45-47 it speaks of there being man first, then spirit.  In other words, there is not a life before this life, but God puts life into us when we are formed.

We also talked about how the Pharisees had so many "rules" that they thought they needed to follow as part of their religion, but Jesus fulfilled the old law with his sacrifice.  Strict rules aren't really what the gospel is all about.  Salvation is a gift from God.  We don't have to do anything but accept and believe in Christ.  The things that we do, our works, stem from loving God and showing him that love by keeping his commandments - not because we have to, but because we love him.

Coming up for Thursday the 4th of March - Communion and Blessed Oil; the "Son of Man" reference; "Saved" - How and When!

Thursday, February 18th - Indescribable

Alice is a bible study group leader in the Women's Study groups at Foursquare. She invited her group of ladies over to her house to watch a movie on her HUGE tv!
The movie was called "Indescribable" and was basically a sermon by Louie Giglio. Prior to seeing this movie, I was really confused about the nature of God and the Godhead. I was raised to believe that God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit were three different and distinct beings. However, most of Christianity believes in the Trinity - that they are one and the same. I needed to wrap my brain around that still, but this movie really helped.
Louie Giglio used the study and discovery of stars and space to illustrate how HUGE God is. Here is a little blurb:
"The heavens are telling the glory of God, and their expanse declares the work of His hands. Night after night they remind us of just how small we are, and how huge God is. Looking out into the far reaches of the universe, we find a seemingly infinite expanse of mystery and wonder, intricately fashioned by a God of unfathomable size and power. Just a glimpse of one of the billions of visible galaxies He has formed resizes us, shrinking us, and the world we call home, to seeming insignificance in an instant. But as tiny as we may seem, the God who knows every star by name also knows yours, and mine. And in the most stunning rescue imaginable, God sent His Son to this spinning planet we call home--the Creator reconnecting us to Himself with life that never ends."
It was really eye opening for me to understand God as beyond universally BIG! Makes it even more amazing that He knows and cares about me, specifically!
But about this trinity thing - I needed to find out more...
Alice and Shelley, my bible study buddies, tried to explain it to me. Alice used the analogy of electricity. No one can really say where electricity comes from, but we know its out there everywhere (God). Electricity can be channeled through power poles for our use (Jesus). It enters our house and allows us to have warmth (Holy Spirit). Yet all along, it's the same thing throughout. One power, in different forms.
I also did some independent study and found the following scriptures insightful:
2 Corinthians 13:14 - May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. (NIV)
Grace = Jesus Christ; Love = God; Fellowship = Holy Spirit
Perhaps these are the roles each play in the whole of who God is.
The famous scripture John 3:16 came to mind and I wondered about the term "only begotten". After looking up the this passage on net.bible.org, I found that the greek word for this term, monogenh, means "one of a kind".
Ultimately, as I was able to view God as larger than any space or time, and if He is truly omnipotent, as displayed throughout the book of Revelations in saying that he is All-Powerful, then he really is able to do anything, including the logically impossible. Like, be in different places at once, or show His power in different forms in the same location.
So, I'm still studying up on this, but "one God" is starting to make more sense.

How it all began...

I was born and raised in the LDS church. I grew up in a very small town where 90% of the population was LDS also. I don't remember any "spiritual experiences" as a kid, but I was being taught every Sunday what to believe.
When I was 15, my family moved to the "mission field" where being LDS made us a minority. That caused me to be all or nothing - which at that time was "all" because I believed that if I went against what I had been taught all of my life, I would be "punished" by God. So really, I was motivated by fear.
I started noticing inconsistencies in doctrines and historical events of the church, but my dad, who considered himself a church intellectual, had all the answers and all the books that explained away the questionable events, so I just put all of these concerns on the back burner and trusted my dad and the church.
I have three siblings - all three went on missions and came home early due to illness. I couldn't believe how horrible they were treated by some of the members because they didn't serve a "full mission". I started to see some appalling behavior as far as the "culture" of the church was concerned and that bothered me as well.
When I was a senior in high school, a guy that I knew was returning from his mission and wanted to date me. All that I knew of him was his "missionary face" and I really didn't know who he was outside of that. However, up to that point, I had gone to church dances and didn't have positive experiences with LDS boys, so I thought that in order for me to find someone inside the church, I better jump at the first opportunity. I married this RM in the temple three months after my high school graduation.
Things started going down hill fast with him. There were several abusive and unhealthy behaviors that came out after we were married. All of my family members were concerned, but I was convinced that I couldn't break my temple marriage without eternal consequences. A year after we were married, I got pregnant and I hoped that my life would get better after our little one arrived. It didn't - when my daughter was six months old we separated. The bishops I went to and asked for guidance and help made ME feel horribly and disregarded my husband's abusive behaviors. We were sent to an LDS counselor who told my husband he needed to come back on his own for some sessions - he never went back.
Our divorce was final when my daughter was one year old and a month later he asked me to write a letter on his behalf to be able to be remarried and sealed in the temple. I couldn't believe it!
Despite that bad marriage and horrible experiences with church leadership, I stayed active. However, as a single parent in a family oriented church, I often felt like an outsider and didn't feel like I fit in most of the time.
This loneliness led me to the desire to look more deeply at the things that I had found inconsistent in the past. Additionally, though I had been taught repeatedly to stay away from "anti" literature, I decided to read this book of a woman's experience as a former member of the church. That is where I learned that there were parts of the temple ceremony that the church removed, but when I learned what these were, I was shocked! I remembered going through the temple for the first time and thinking it was weird and uncomfortable, but because everyone else was doing it- people I trusted - I thought it was okay. But after reading about the parts that were removed, I made a conscious decision to step back from the church. I went to my bishop, gave him my temple recommend, told him I didn't want it anymore and after leaving that day, I have never been back.
However, stepping back required me to question everything - including who I really was because so much of my identity revolved around "the church". I decided I needed to break down EVERYTHING and start over. So, I threw the baby out with the bath water and studied ALL religions. What I found, after studying many things, was the God Is LOVE. I determined that if I loved myself, my family and people, then I would have God with me, until I could figure out where my spiritual home was.
When I met my husband, neither of us attended any kind of church. He was raised Christian, but didn't attend regularly. After we got married, we determined we needed to find a spiritual home for our family. One of his closest friends recommended a Foursquare church in the area that we live.
We went off and on for a few months and then decided to fully commit to making it our spiritual home. However, I still had, looming in the back of my mind, doubts about my having left the LDS church and wondering if I had done the right thing. Then I met this woman (Alice) who had a ministry in helping people who had left the LDS church - she was also formerly LDS. I first met with her in November of 2009.
Up to that point, I had based my leaving the church off of my own feelings about the inconsistencies and personal experiences that were negative. However, it was really "feeling" based and I didn't have a lot of facts that helped confirmed my decision. This sweet lady had FACTS! I studied about the book of Abraham and how it came about, the DNA of American Indians and so forth. Here were the facts that backed up my concern that the LDS church was founded on some bogus things.
After getting all the information I needed to be at peace about leaving the LDS church, I knew I needed to focus on what Christianity was. The best place to start was the bible. I started on my own, but was encouraged at church to get a bible buddy. And guess who it was that offered? Alice!
Now on Thursdays Alice and I get together with another former LDS lady and we study, study, study! It has been so helpful and a wonderful opportunity for fellowship!